Dear Diary;
This morning, I ordered a Hoveround Power Chair for the new place. They’re giving me a bigass discount if I write a testimonial! Cardinal ‘Frankie’ diFranco has kindly offered to bless it for me. This is gonna be lots more fun than that motorized platform they’ve been pushing me around on for the past few years. And the chair even comes with a chalice cup holder and wicker basket to hold my at-home communion kit. Which, by the way, I’m now calling my Pontifikit – or maybe even Porta-Pope… I haven’t fully decided.

Nine more days!